Once upon a time.... I blogged. and then I didn't.

So here I am again! miss me? Of course you did. :) Well. Today is the first Tuesday of Summer. Weird? I think yes.
Friday was graduation, and I'm pretty sure I would've loved Dorothy's speech the best except for this guy I like to call Jacob Zachery Brady Barrie just so happened to leave his stinkin truck lights on. Guess who was lucky enough to go turn them off before the battery died and we were stranded? (Yes, of course me. :p That's why I didn't get to hear all of Dorothy's speech of geese.)
Back to my point of talking about graduation.
I'M PRACTICALLY OLD! Ok, Ok. Not really. Yet.
But practically!!
I have one year. Based on my 'Holy garbage this year went by super fast!' thought processes I'm positive that next year will fly too.
I almost burst into random tears of freaking outage at graduation. I'm a senior. Or will be in a couple months. Whatever your table of time measurement for grade oldness is.
One year! (AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!)
Justin will be leaving for the MTC this summer, he just got his endowments. Kudos and stuff, I mean that's soooo amazing for him, but I'm sad!
And Aubree graduated Friday as well. And she's leaving the country in a monthish. To Europe. Can you see the green oozing out of these words?? :p I'm so jealous, I want to tour Europe!!! Take me with you!

So next year's my year. My year to finish out my high school career even though I swear I just barely started it. My year to prepare for college and future occupations and everything. I feel so small! I can't be a senior! I mean, I swear it was like yesterday (er... or maybe like... four years ago. :p) when I'd look at all the seniors and think how grown up and adult-like and gorgeous they all were.
Um, I feel seriously lacking in ALL of those categories.
Adult-like?? Ha! I still want to run through sprinklers and color in Sponge-Bob coloring books and spend all day climbing trees and running around outside. I don't even know what I want to do with my life because all I really want to do later in the future is stay at home with cute chubby kids. :) I don't want an occupation. I mean, I see how it's a good idea to have a degree in something just in case I just so happen to marry a stunts man who dies in some fiery crash for the sake of Hollywood. It's grand to be prepared but I don't know what to prepare myself in! :p I've thought about starting my own photography business but honestly, that just scares the licorice out of me. It sounds so big and intimidating to attempt to elbow my way into the business world. Then I thought about teaching High School English (all because of Mrs. Jordan. :) She's the greatest of all greatness! :p) but then I thought for another two and a half minutes and realized how brutal us high school students tend to be and how much I wouldn't love grating my nerves in a classroom with students like me for fifty million years for small wages. Then there was elementary education but EVERYONE is doing that. And as much as I love working with little kids... like maybe first grade level is where I'd want to be- it falls back on the 'takes-all-my-time-for-not-enough-pay' stuff. Then I thought about architecture for about an hour. Then realized math would slaughter me if I tried it. :p And then I stopped thinking about that for a while and thought about how I probably could do any of that stuff if I really wanted to, I just kinda hold myself back based on intimidation and fear. So then I decided on Pro-wrestling ;) HA! Just kidding.
It's just so many decisions that are bigger than what to wear or how to do my hair for picture day kind of decisions. More than what sounds good for lunch, or what if I don't do my homework. More than how should I redecorate my room.
THIS IS SERIOUS! (said in a small child-like voice like, 'dis is sewious'. Also it's sang like they do on wonderpets. :) Just kiddin. Mostly.)

So anyway. If I can survive this summer, I'm fairly convinced the rest of my life will fly by pretty fast.
Which is still weirding me out.
This whole realization stuff is sorta blissfully-uncomfortable.
I haven't decided if I like it or not yet.

...We're off to go see WICKED!

Bwahaha.
You might be wondering why I'm updating my blog during school hours.
(Maybe not. I like to think you are, because that would mean someone posesses at least some feelings of interest or concern for my sadly strange life. :p )
Well, my dears, this is because....
I'M SCHOOL EXCUSED!
(Ha! You thought I was going to say because I was going to see Wicked. Which is mostly true. However, the most important matter at hand in this moment is the fact that I'm getting out of my afternoon classes. Although it's not really getting out of much. I have seminary right after lunch, and I actually mostly like that class. Despite the total anarchal chaos. Oh Jesse. *shakes head sadly.*)
Moving on. Today is May 1.
Um, MAY??? Already? It's insane how fast the time is flying.
Which definitely means I'm hitting panic mode.
A)I have to finish out this school year on top of homework. Sounds easy, right? WRONG! I have severe balancing problems. :p So I always focus too much in one subject and then the other seven slip. It's more difficult than you'd think. Except for not. Only if you're a schizophrenic psycho. (yeah.) Or a procrastinator (Unite!.... Tomorrow! :D) Or maybe if you're just lazy.
And heck, if you're all three, I have only one thing to say.
Impending Doom!
(Haha ok so not really.)

B) (you thought I forgot about B didn't you. Or maybe you just forgot about B altogether. Either way...)
B) I need to kick the 'Let's earn tons of money so college isn't totally painful to try and pay bills.' plan into action! Fast!
I feel so trapped in this time frame. I can't go back, but I can't skip forward. It's like the slowest moving window of my life. Except for when you look back and everything looks tiny in the far distance and then you have to wonder where in the world all of that time went.

So basically... time went by fast again, and I must stop this rambling blogage because we're gonna go drive forever to go see WICKED!!!! :D
I'll let ya know how it goes. :p